One of Davey’s aunts in Rochester gave him a book for his birthday…Alexander and The Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day.   Davey loves the book.   He usually hears it twice a day, once before nap time and once before bed time at night.   While reading it to him today for his nap, I started thinking about how one could be written for Mommies…Mommy and The Terrible, Horrible, No Good, Very Bad Day.  So, here’s my brief version.

Last night I stayed up too late to watch the Presidential debate.   It made me angry, they made me angry.  Then my mind wouldn’t shut down, so I watched Facts of Life re-runs on T.V.   My husband’s alarm went off too early, and I’d barely had any sleep, so my head was killing me.   It’s going to be a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day. 

Davey woke up while I was watching a recap of the Presidential debate.   My coffee was still brewing, and he was screaming.   My husband brought him downstairs.   I cut up a banana for him for breakfast, gave him his milk, and sat down with my coffee.   Davey took his banana and smushed it between his hands.   Banana guts squirted everywhere, on the dog’s head, the carpet and the table.   Then he ran his banana hands along the sofa and the walls.   It’s going to be a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day.  

We went upstairs to get our clothes on so that we could go to story time at the library.   While I’m using the bathroom, Davey gets under the cabinets and pulls out the baby powder, which I left open.   When I come out of the bathroom, Davey, the carpet, and the floors, and yes the dog, are covered in white powder.   Davey’s laughing at me as he continues to shake the powder.   It’s going to be a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day. 

While putting on his clothes, Davey reaches into the changing table basket and pulls out the diaper rash cream.  As I’m digging out a pair of socks for him, he’s opened the cream and is squeezing it out everywhere.   It’s going to be a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day.

At story time, he spits milk from his mouth, grabs other babies sippy cups, steals the bear and other kids books, throws a book at a kid, pulls my hair (and nearly my sweatpants down), before taking his sippy cup and dumping out his milk on the carpeted floor of the library.   It’s going to be a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day. 

When we get home from the library, he’s managed to wet his diaper which has gone all the way through to his pants.   Lovely diaper didn’t hold, which is a first.   It’s been a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day. 

On a personal note, my head stills hurts, I have a massive zit forming on my chin, and my favorite pair of sweatpants shrunk (lengthwise, folks).   It’s been a terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day.