Another Day, Another Adventure

It’s never ending and it’s always something new. That’s motherhood! It’s not always exciting and fascinating. Sometimes it leaves me feeling downtrodden and weary, but I’ve come to look forward to the next adventure on my walk down Mommyhood Lane.

Henry is 6 weeks old today! I can’t believe how quickly time has flown and it makes me happy to know that I’m home with him especially when you consider that maternity leave in the US is merely 6 weeks and I was preparing myself to go back to work at this time with Davey.

Henry is sleeping better at night (last night we were at 4 hour intervals) and he’s just growing into this wonderful little man. I relish the fact that I’m a part of his life and I get to call myself his mother even on the days when he decides to go through 4 outfits because he’s had diaper blow outs like today. Sheesh!

Davey, on the other hand, is a different story. He’s well past the diaper blow outs, but still in the diapers. He’s getting physically bigger and is quite the intelligent little boy. One day we’re making muffins in the kitchen and he’s reading a cookbook and the next day I’m cleaning out egg salad from his nostrils. Yes, you did read that correctly. I’m not sure what the fascination is these days with cramming things up the nose. I’m not really sure why any toddler seems to enjoy doing that. For those of you who have a toddler who seems to have completely avoided this phase, count your blessings. It’s rather disgusting to have my child sneeze on me two hours AFTER I’ve cleaned out his nose, and be covered in snot laced egg salad. You can gag at that…I am!

But I guess one of the things I’m loving about my adventures is the fact that no matter where I turn, whether it be in my house or outside in the world, I find some little item that makes me smile. Even on the days when I’m exhausted with a toddler who refuses to take a nap, I can’t help but chuckle when he grabs his Bible and tells me he needs Jesus.

And then there are the days that I’m scrambling to get ready for church and I slide my foot into a pair of shoes only to discover that it’s become a garage for Matchbox cars. It’s the little things that impact me the most.

Henry is starting to smile. He rolled over three times all by himself last week! How crazy is that?!?!? 5 weeks old and he’s rolling over. Davey was a walker at 9 months, so am I to expect the same from Henry? Who knows!?!?! I’m in no hurry because if I could really just bottle up these days, even the nights when I’m getting no sleep, I would gladly do it in a heartbeat and revisit them.

Yesterday, I opened up my nightstand drawer only to find a piece of paper that Davey had colored on. Was it meant to be a gift for me? Maybe not, but it still made me smile to know that even when I am not physically with my boys, they are constantly around me. How blessed and fortunate I am!

There are days when I can’t wait to see what the next adventure to unfold will be. Do I lose sleep over them? Not really. What a truly wonderful life I have.

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A Whole New World

I consider myself to be the writer in the family. I’m not necessarily all that great at it, but I do enjoy it and I try to put forth the effort to write daily. A lot of times I hit your typical writer’s block and feel that I am less that enthusiastic about writing or that I’ve perhaps lost my ability to really communicate fluently and gracefully. I’ve often found myself reading a lot of old classics just so that I can possibly tap into the vibe of eloquent writing and colorfully displaying how I’m truly feeling through my writing. This past week, my husband decided to tap into my “vibe” and he spilled forth a beautiful and heart warming display of how becoming a parent has changed his life and his perspective as well as that of mine. He actually took a few moments to share it with the world on Facebook, but for those of you who perhaps didn’t see it, let me share it with you here.

“As I sit here with my both of my boys, I can’t help but smile watching them. As a parent, the love you have for your children consumes your life, and you realize that this is a glimpse into what God’s love is towards each of us. I realize I didn’t remotely understand that until Davey came into our lives, now with Henry I have an even better understanding because you can see how you can love each equally, but differently.”

Wow! How profound, poetic, insightful, and heartwarmingly true is that statement?!?!?! I couldn’t have said it better myself.

Our lives have been turned upside down becoming parents. You quickly learn that the things that once seemed important have become trivial. You look at these wonderful little human beings, human beings with yours and your partner’s traits, and think, “how is it possible for someone like me to create something as wonderful as this?” I’m constantly in awe of both of my babies. I’m in awe of God’s love towards me and my husband, that he would grace sinners like us with such wonderful little gifts and entrust in us to be the parents He has always deemed for us to be.

Last night, after the third time of waking with Henry, I prayed to God. I prayed that He would guide me and give me strength to work through the sleepless nights, to not despair, and not fret. Even on the fourth time, as I had tears rolling down my cheeks, I managed to push away the thoughts that were trying to seep into my head; thoughts like, “what was I thinking by becoming a mother,” and “I’m a horrible mother who cannot even comfort her own infant son.”

We’re living in a whole new world, my husband and I. A world with new loves, new adventures, new enlightenments, and new phases. It’s not always an easy trip, nothing really ever is, but how wonderful it is that we have the opportunity to go on this trip; a trip called “parenthood”.

Good Night, Sweetheart

I’ve found myself singing that old Sha-Na-Na song, “Good night, Sweetheart”, when trying to put Henry to bed. I’ve actually found myself doing a lot of things over the past three weeks in an effort to put Davey to bed at night. Lately, I’ve felt like sleeping at night is more like a chemistry experiment, as opposed to just getting in my nice warm bed and closing my eyes and drifting off. And let me just say, I HATED Chemistry. I sucked at it, couldn’t stand it, and was beyond being excited when those days of my high school were over.

You see, here’s my issue, and it’s the same issue countless other parents experience…getting your child to sleep.

Some days I wish I had a time machine and could perhaps just go back and literally watch what my husband and I did with Davey in order to get him to sleep at night. Other days I really wish I’d done a better job of documenting his sleep patterns, but who would have really thought that would come in handy? I’ve even scoured through this blog to see if I had posted in advice on getting a baby to sleep. The only thing I found was that Davey HAD to be swaddled. It was the only way he would sleep. Henry? Not so much. So, now I feel like we’re starting over again, which technically we are.

Henry sleeps, but it’s not a quiet sleep. He’s a grunter and a moaner and it takes some time for him to fall asleep. Davey would immediately go back to sleep after he was swaddled and nursed. It was pretty easy peasy and I even found myself jumping up some times at night just to check on him because he was such a quiet sleeper. Not the case with Henry. I’m having to figure out a way to tune out all the grunts just so that I can get some sort of shut eye!

We’ve tried the swaddling. We’ve tried the rocking. We’ve tried the white noise (which by the way worked in the hospital on his 2nd night). We’ve tried his crib. We’ve tried the bassinet. We’ve tried giving him a bottle of breast milk. We’ve tried everything and what we seem to find right now that works the best (although not as good as anything did with Davey) is to put him in the Mamaroo alongside my part of the bed, turn it on, and let him go to sleep. Even then, he stills has the occasional grunt and moan, but not as bad as when he’s lying out flat on his back.

I’m sure I’m going to get some stunned comments about this post. I’m sure there will be some mother(s) out there who feel that I’m practicing unhealthy and perhaps unsafe sleep with Henry. I can assure you, we’ve taken every precaution necessary, but we ALL (including Henry) need some sleep.

I’ve googled possible diets I should be on in the event that it’s something I’m eating that’s passing through my breast milk that’s keeping him from sleeping. I believe he does have acid reflux as he want lie out flat to sleep and anytime we try to put him that way he immediately starts spitting up and then develops the hiccups that of course seem to anger him and keep him awake. I’m pretty adamant about breast feeding Henry, but I wonder if there is perhaps a type of formula I could try as a supplement?

So, with this blog, I’m really looking for some help out there, Moms. I know it’s early and I know I shouldn’t expect for him to be sleeping through the night quite so soon, but he should still be sleeping and not have to sleep on an incline. Any suggestions of what to try? And please, I’m really not interested in being berated or criticized for the fact that he sleeps in a Mamaroo right now. I don’t anticipate this lasting forever.

Much thanks!

Real World Multi-Tasking

I’m a little late on this post, but seeing as how the photo is still circulating through the web and in discussions with some of my fellow moms, I figured it was safe to blog about real world multi-tasking and not the type that Gisele Bundchen subscribes to.

Shortly before Christmas, Gisele Bundchen (supermodel and wife of New England Patriots quarterback, Tom Brady) tweeted a picture of herself as she was nursing her daughter. She titled the photo: “Multi-tasking”. Problem is, she wasn’t actually multi-tasking, it was more like she was being multi-tasked on. While nursing her daughter, Gisele had her head flung back so her golden tresses could be styled, and her make up applied, but she didn’t stop there. She had yet a 3rd person who was giving her a manicure. As a side note, let me say kudos for the fact that she is nursing her daughter and not ashamed to show it.

In light of her version of multi-tasking, I decided I would drop her a quick little note that describes a day in the life of a normal, day-to-day stay at home mom who does not have the luxury of having extra personnel to help out with the day. So, Gisele, should you decide to really know what multi-tasking as a mom is all about here’s my past few days with a 27 month old and a 3 week old. Ready? Go!

Multi-tasking is when you’re trying to deal with tech support on your computer, while also nursing your three week old, and paying bills.

Multi-tasking is when you’re nursing your three week old, while also changing the diaper of your 27 month old.

Multi-tasking is when you’re nursing your three week old, cooking dinner, and cleaning up from the disaster the dog left at the trash can.

Multi-tasking is when you’re nursing your three week old and cleaning off crayons from the wall while also making sure that your 27 month old stays in the time out he was placed in for causing you to multi-task this issue.

Multi-tasking is when you’re able to write this blog, while nursing your three week old, and making sure that your 27 month old is happily watching Mickey Mouse Clubhouse.

Multi-tasking is when you’re changing your three week old’s diaper while in the bathroom because you’re also potty training your 27 month old.

Multi-tasking is when you’re able to give your three week old a bottle while also folding clothes.

Multi-tasking is when YOU are the one physically doing multiple tasks, NOT when you’re doing one task while other people complete the rest.

So, Gisele, please think about the rest of us moms who don’t have your millions of dollars before you decide to insult us by throwing out a picture of your supposed “multi-tasking” abilities. Perhaps you could even pull the word up in a dictionary to find out the true meaning in order to use it correctly.

Marking Territories

Everyone told me to be prepared for this. For the past 3 weeks, I’ve bragged about Davey NOT behaving as everyone said he would. From day one, he held his little brother lovingly, would greet him in the mornings with a handshake and a, “nice to meet you, Henry.” I was just so proud and knew for certain that my sweet Davey would stun the world. Unfortunately, I’ve allowed myself to live in an altered reality, at least in my head.

Today marks the first day of me operating solo with both of my boys. Henry woke me at 5:30, so after nursing him, I climbed into the shower, then trudged downstairs for a cup of coffee and my 30 minutes of Bible study. It’s a new day in a new year, so why not start it off structured and organized, right? Davey slept until almost 8 am which means he missed seeing his daddy this morning. I did my normal morning routine of singing my own personal take on “Good Morning”, from the musical Singing in the Rain, and dressed Davey. As a side note, when I wake him he requests “Good Morning”.

So, Davey and I talked during breakfast. We counted, said our ABCs, and sang a couple of songs, all of which we’ve done PH (moving forward, this stands for Pre-Henry). It wasn’t until Henry started crying, that the demeanor of my cute and sweet little two year old morphed into something I’d hoped we’d never encounter…the Jealousy Monster.

This morning, all I’ve heard is Davey say that he doesn’t like Henry. I’ve watched him scowl when I would pick up Henry to nurse him. “No, Mama, no. Not feed Henry.” I’ve tried to read to Davey while nursing Henry (which worked last week), but instead I got, “mama is Davey mama, not Henry.” I told Davey I could still read to him, which seemed to be fine until Henry became fussy again. I told Davey I needed to change Henry’s diaper, “no, mama, not change Henry diaper. put him in floor.” I’m shocked, although I shouldn’t be. Everyone told me Davey would start becoming territorial.

Over the weekend, I was paged upstairs to Davey’s room while my husband was putting Davey to bed. I handed off Henry and went into Davey’s room. He wanted mommy to read to him! How wonderfully sweet, I thought. So, I read to him, but when I would try to leave I was met with tears and sobs followed by, “mommy, hold me. Mommy, I love you. Mommy, don’t leave me. Mommy, please come back, I be a good boy, please, mommy.” It tore me up! I eventually had to leave to nurse Henry, so my husband took over with Davey. I listened through the monitor as my husband explained to Davey that mommy still loved him, but she also loves Henry. At first, it felt so good because it meant Davey needed me, but lately I feel bad because I can’t let everything be about him anymore.

And as if I needed something more on my plate, Henry has decided that today is the day he MUST be held. I’ve bragged about the fact that he seems to be more independent than Davey was, that he’s content to be in the pack and play or the Mamaroo, but not today. Much like Davey, Henry seems to be marking his territory while thumbing his nose at his big brother. It’s going to be a fun, fun world in the Doser household moving forward.