One definition for the word comfort is as a noun and according to dictionary.com, it is a state of ease and satisfaction of bodily wants, with freedom from pain and anxiety. Of course, the word can be used as a verb, an adjective, adverb, and basically takes on numerous connotations. We all experience levels of comfort and once we’ve found that particular territory, we’re a bit leery to step outside of the zone. I’m here to tell you that comfort is a bit overrated.
Yesterday was my first official playdate with other mommies I only met less than a week ago. At first, as I sat on my couch and watched my son sleep, I decided I would chicken out even after I had already RSVP’d. After all, why would I want to step outside of my comfort zone? I’ll tell you why…for the benefit and welfare of my son.
I worry about his social interaction with other children. I’ve heard horror stories of socially inhibited children because they were not allowed any sort of outside the home interaction with other children their age. I don’t want my son eventually going to school and not being able to make friends. As a child, I was apparently pretty outgoing, eager to sever the ties with my parents and even at one point as my parents were registering me for kindergarten, throwing a temper tantrum as I found out that we were only registering and I wasn’t officially starting that day. I believe the words my mother said I used to cut her open were, “You don’t let me do anything!” What a precocious little 5-year-old I was. I’m hoping my son is the same, but in order to do so I have to sacrifice more than just my time and my career in order to encourage him to be a well-rounded child. I have to sacrifice my personal comfort.
I think I blogged before about how I’m not very good at idle chit-chat or making new friends. I don’t go out of my way to meet new people, but will gladly take a few moments to speak with them if they are the one to initiate the interaction. Yesterday, I sucked up the fear and discomfort, loaded up my son and headed out to his first playdate.
I was the last one to arrive by nearly 30 minutes, which is unusual for me. I’m ALWAYS on time or early, but in my defense I did get lost trying to find the house. When I arrived, the other mommies and babies were already in full socialization mode. Davey is the youngest of the group, although you couldn’t tell that based upon his size in comparison to the other babies, so he couldn’t crawl around and mingle as much. Fortunately, we were able to put him in the exer-saucer and let him bounce away while other babies crawled to him. I had my coffee and cookies, spoke with other mommies about what they did BEFORE becoming SAHMs, where they were from, what they’re husbands do and if they were looking to have other children. We exchanged anecdotes and recipes and I have to honestly say it was the most wonderful time I’ve had in a while.
About an hour into the playdate, my son in true center of attention fashion, decided to break up the mommy chit-chat. Davey loves to jump. As a matter of fact, I’m convinced the reason he’s so slim is because he’s such an active baby and burns calories like CRAZY! This doesn’t bode well for me in the future as I’m sure he’s going to eat me out of house and home, but that’s for another post. So, as we mommies were talking and a few of the other babies were getting quiet, we hear grunts with a clankity, clankity sound of springs and hard breathing. I saw the other mommies look at me and meekly smile as they took sips from their coffee and I smiled. A couple of mommies actually seemed to be flush with embarassment (I was flushed due to the heat in he house.). Let me just put this vision in your head…my son, as he jumped in the exer-saucer, was making a noise with his grunts, breathing, and springy sounds that seemed to possibly come straight out of some R-rated movie. That’s my boy. He’s always good at injecting a little sense of comfort-banishing antics when I least expect.
At least Davey and I weren’t so socially awkward that we were left out of a weekend birthday party for one of the other babies. Plus, we’ve even managed to secure an invite to another one of these playdates next week and I’ve even volunteered to alter houses and use ours! Summer should be awesome with our community pool, so to say I’m excited about how well things turned out yesterday, would be a bit of an understatement. I’m thrilled and can’t wait for our next group play.