At first, I was excited to just buy clothes for Davey and items for the nursery.   I went for months without purchasing any clothing for myself and I was perfectly fine with that.   It could have been because I became pregnant during the middle of winter and I could hide myself behind thick clothing and the grays of the season.   My clothing fit my mood and my personality, after all I was referring to my unborn child as a parasite.   Naturally, I had no desire to really do any shopping for myself.   I could feel my body slowly fading away from the toned level I had worked so hard to attain, to an out of shape, slug-worthy shell of a person.  

This week marks my 18th week of pregnancy and now my body has started to actually contort and form into what is beginning to no longer look like someone who just eats and lies around on the sofa.   No, my body is starting to look pregnant, which is making me feel more pregnant.   It’s a great feeling, as I lie in bed and I can see my growing belly.   I’ve actually gotten to the point where I’m anxious and excited to purchase maternity clothes.   But herein lies my problem…….there are not a lot of choices in the maternity clothes department!

Last Friday, at lunch, I hightailed it across the street to the mall.   Spring has arrived after all and I’m a sucker for dresses, anything that’s fun, flirty, and feminine.   I walked into Dillard’s and the first thing I saw was this beautiful orange chiffon dress.   It was cinched at the waist, flared out at the hips, sleeveless, with ruffles around the collar and down the neck line.   It was an awesome dress and it was on sale, a double bonus.    The problem with this dress is that it wasn’t a maternity dress nor did they make it in a maternity size.   And here’s what’s even more annoying and disappointing is that Dillard’s doesn’t carry maternity clothes.  As a matter of fact, NONE OF THE DEPARTMENT STORES CARRY MATERNITY CLOTHES!   What is this travesty?   Why can’t a department store the size of Dillard’s or Macy’s or even Belk cater to all the women in this world who are becoming mothers?   They carry petites, talls, plus size, and even juniors, but no maternity section?!?!?!? 

Instead, I’m forced to go a small shop within the mall that carries overpriced clothing because they know they can charge the amounts they do thanks to the law of supply and demand.  I wouldn’t be so upset with the price of the clothing if the selection were just a bit better.   Just because you’re a mom, does that mean you lose your sense of style as well?   Not for me.   I made two purchases before leaving the store extremely disappointed.

As I made my walk back to my car, I was forced to walk back through Dillard’s and endure the barrage of bright and beautiful spring dresses that I won’t be able to wear.   Yeah, I guess I wasn’t exactly forced to walk back through Dillard’s.   I could have walked out of the mall’s entrance into the flower bed with overgrown juniper and decomposing trash and through the parking lot just to avoid the abashing pain of looking at clothing I can’t wear anymore, but I didn’t.   When I made it back into the confines of my car, I silently sat and wept.   I suppose it was from anger, or maybe from pity, but more than likely it was from my heightened emotional state thanks to my raging hormones that comes with pregnancy. 

My poor husband has offered to take me to stores all throughout Greenville in my quest to find maternity clothing.  I’m sure I’ll eventually take him up on that offer, but for now I think I wanna just stay in my pouty state of mind.