It’s amazing what happens when a woman finds out she’s becoming a mother. Her nurturing and nesting skills start to take flight. No more is it just about her, but it becomes more about the little bundle of joy she’s carrying in her womb.
I am 12 weeks along today and I actually read that my baby has reflexes now. I can actually prod my abdomen and my baby will feel it and will reciprocate with a little pushing and shoving of its own. Of course, I can’t feel it right now, but it definitely has me thinking and pre-reminiscing (if that’s possible). Today I found myself sitting in my little Butterbean’s bedroom. Three walls are now painted, one twin bed is broken down, and I’ve even cleaned the blinds and windows. Thanks to today’s beautiful weather, I even decided to open the windows and let the gloriousness of God’s work seep right through.
I sat in the floor, my back up against the lone twin bed. I could feel the breeze of Spring’s prelude hitting me in the face and I closed my eyes. I thought about my little Butterbean, what it may be, what it may become in life and the many little wonders that are going to be waiting for me and my husband. I smiled as I imagined my days of sitting in this room, holding my precious cargo tight while looking out the window. I could even see me sitting in the middle of the floor stacking blocks, flipping through books, or just playing the most minor of games, patty cake with my baby. I opened my eyes and watched as another couple pushed along a stroller outside our house. That’s going to be me this time next year, I thought and how exciting is that?
As I cradled my belly a little more tightly, I couldn’t imagine what life would be like if I couldn’t experience this one true little miracle of heaven. I looked up at the ceiling and glanced around the nursery and thought about all of the memories I will be creating with my baby. I thought about all the opportunities I wanted my child to have, the sacrifices I would gladly make, and the unbelievably powerful love I could have for someone. It is immeasurable and uncomprehendable sometimes, but it’s a love deep down within the heart of your soul. And how I could have that for something that’s not even a part of this world yet, is unreal.
A nursery used to be nothing more than a room where a baby slept, at least to an outsider looking in and to me at one point. Now my nursery is a magical world with so many memories to be made. I can hardly wait for my preview of another little imagined journey with Baby Doser tomorrw night.