Stage Five Clinger

I’ve wanted this day.  I’ve prayed for this day.  Now I can’t help but wonder what I was thinking, but really I’m grateful.

I’ve wondered for months when Davey would start clinging to me.   When would he reach for me?  When would he latch on to me and when would he pick me over his daddy?   Well, three out of four ain’t bad.   Davey isn’t actually picking me over his daddy.

I can’t exactly pinpoint when it happened, but today Davey has definitely reached the stage five status.

He now reaches for me, which at first made me so happy (well it still makes me happy), but it’s a bit too much.  If I don’t pick him up, then we get screaming and kicking followed quickly by a strained face that turns red and looks like at any moment blood vessels may pop at any point.

Today as I got closer to him, Davey actually reached out to my left leg and held tightly to it.  For a moment, I was nervous that I was going to have to try to walk with him still hooked onto my leg.

While I have looked towards this day for quite some time, more so for selfish reasons than anything else, I’m a little worried about what it means in the long run.   Right now I can’t seem to get anything accomplished without carrying Davey around with me.  I suppose I could just let him scream and cry it out, but I don’t have that ability to just “turn off” my sense of hearing where Davey is concerned.   Today I actually managed to cook dinner (venison tenderloin, roasted brussel sprouts, and brown rice – a small feat in itself) while holding Davey the entire time.   I even unloaded the dishwasher and reloaded it, but this can’t go on forever.  It’s going to be hard to do laundry with Davey in my arms.

I also started thinking about the fact that I shouldn’t be complaining about Davey clinging to me.   He’s only going  to be small for a short amount of time and there are going to be days when I could only WISH he would cling to me so desperately.



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