A Whole New World

I consider myself to be the writer in the family. I’m not necessarily all that great at it, but I do enjoy it and I try to put forth the effort to write daily. A lot of times I hit your typical writer’s block and feel that I am less that enthusiastic about writing or that I’ve perhaps lost my ability to really communicate fluently and gracefully. I’ve often found myself reading a lot of old classics just so that I can possibly tap into the vibe of eloquent writing and colorfully displaying how I’m truly feeling through my writing. This past week, my husband decided to tap into my “vibe” and he spilled forth a beautiful and heart warming display of how becoming a parent has changed his life and his perspective as well as that of mine. He actually took a few moments to share it with the world on Facebook, but for those of you who perhaps didn’t see it, let me share it with you here.

“As I sit here with my both of my boys, I can’t help but smile watching them. As a parent, the love you have for your children consumes your life, and you realize that this is a glimpse into what God’s love is towards each of us. I realize I didn’t remotely understand that until Davey came into our lives, now with Henry I have an even better understanding because you can see how you can love each equally, but differently.”

Wow! How profound, poetic, insightful, and heartwarmingly true is that statement?!?!?! I couldn’t have said it better myself.

Our lives have been turned upside down becoming parents. You quickly learn that the things that once seemed important have become trivial. You look at these wonderful little human beings, human beings with yours and your partner’s traits, and think, “how is it possible for someone like me to create something as wonderful as this?” I’m constantly in awe of both of my babies. I’m in awe of God’s love towards me and my husband, that he would grace sinners like us with such wonderful little gifts and entrust in us to be the parents He has always deemed for us to be.

Last night, after the third time of waking with Henry, I prayed to God. I prayed that He would guide me and give me strength to work through the sleepless nights, to not despair, and not fret. Even on the fourth time, as I had tears rolling down my cheeks, I managed to push away the thoughts that were trying to seep into my head; thoughts like, “what was I thinking by becoming a mother,” and “I’m a horrible mother who cannot even comfort her own infant son.”

We’re living in a whole new world, my husband and I. A world with new loves, new adventures, new enlightenments, and new phases. It’s not always an easy trip, nothing really ever is, but how wonderful it is that we have the opportunity to go on this trip; a trip called “parenthood”.


First Week is in the Books!

I often spent many a night before Henry was born wondering how we were going to handle two children in the house. I pondered how difficult it would be with a newborn and even worried about my two year old becoming more rebellious than normal. I imagined everything I possibly could, most of which was bad, before we were discharged from the hospital. As the nurse was transporting me down to the car, my newborn son cradled into my arms, an immense fear seemed to take hold of me and I felt as if a heavy boulder was pushing down on my chest. Where was all of my excitement and bliss about my sweet little baby? Where were all the daydreams about a happy, romantic family ala the days of Norman Rockefeller or the Waltons? All feelings I’d had when my son was first born and placed into my arms quickly dissipated and reality set in. Could I do this? Well, let’s just fill you in on week one…

My husband had to work all week. There wasn’t a grace period of sorts like there was with Davey. He’s been promoted since the days when Davey was born and with that promotion comes much larger responsibilities. If he were in his old job, he would have been home, but if he were in his old job, I wouldn’t be a stay-at-home mom, either. So, Tuesday started out the first official day of being home with Henry and with Davey and it was a piece of cake. Davey had school, so my husband went into work late to take him. My mom and dad came to stay with me and help out with Henry. Piece of cake. Flash forward to that evening when my husband came home from work and informed me that he had to be in Pinehurst, NC for a job all day on Wednesday (a 5 hour drive from our house). As a side note, I hope the project manager for this job gets a bag of poop from Santa. Because of this job, the rest of the week became a catastrophe.

Wednesday morning, my husband took me and Henry to Henry’s first doctor’s appointment and my dad stayed with Davey. Thanks to the C-section and the pain medication, I was unable to drive us. At least the one side perk to this day was that Henry had gained 4 ounces in 2 days! He IS my little porker. After depositing us back at home with my dad, my husband drove back to work, got his rental car and took off east bound and down for NC. He was not to return until 8 o’clock that evening. Thankfully, my mother had arrived in the afternoon and we had a wonderful dinner. Now here’s where the week gets better (insert sarcasm) and once again I blame it on the Pinehurst trip. Did I say that I wanted Santa to leave the project manager a bag of poop? I did? Well, let’s make that a BIG bag of poop.

Thursday morning, my husband walked out the door for work only to find that the rental car he was driving had been broken into. Sigh. So, between entertaining my 2 year old and nursing my 6 day old, I had to call the police, file a report, get my husband back here, have forensics go over the car, contact the rest of the board on our HOA (I’m one of the V.P.’s), get a post on our neighborhood Facebook page, and call a locksmith. I hope this thief gets just as big a bag of poop as the project manager in Pinehurst. And oh, by the way, my parents informed me they could not come over first thing on Friday morning to help because their freezer had gone out and they needed to find a way to salvage a few thousand dollars worth of food. Again…sigh. Surely, Friday would be better!

Friday rolls around and to start the day off on the right note, Henry had started sleeping 4 hour increments at night! Woo hoo! Unfortunately, my husband didn’t get to really enjoy the extra sleep seeing as how he had to be on the road at 4:30 for another day of travel that probably would not end until after 8 o’clock again. It was ok, because I was hitting my stride with a toddler and a newborn. So, just when I thought everything was under control, we lost power. I called the power company while dealing with an antsy toddler and a screaming newborn only to have the lady tell me there was no power outage. I’m sorry!?!? Did we forget to pay our powerbill? Come to find out there was a fire at a local substation. We were without power for 3 hours. And while at first I became frantic, I quickly slid into play mode with my 2 year old while my one week old slept. The other plus side to the day was that at least my husband was able to come home early and we could go to a family Christmas party where I was informed that I didn’t look like I’d just had a baby a week before. SCORE! Insert a HUGE happy smile and even a happy dance.

So, long story short, I survived the first week. Davey is adapting very well to having a little brother. When Henry cries, he says, “Don’t cry, Henry, it be ok.” Every morning he greets Henry with a handshake and a “nice to see you, Henry.” Henry seems to enjoy the Mamaroo which means my hands are free to do a lot more. It may not be as glamorous or romantic as what’s portrayed in Hollywood, but it’s the most wonderful thing I’ve ever had. Here’s looking forward to the rest of our lives.