Tag: Greenville SC

Heroes and Bad Guys

On By Doser3In Dreaming of Mommyhood - GeneralLeave a comment

At what age do you have this conversation?   No, I’m not talking about the birds and the bees, but the ones where you talk about bad guys.   How do you explain it to a precocious four year old so that he understands, that he empathizes, but that he’s not terrified of every person who is lurking around the corner?  How much is too much to tell?

Davey has always understood the level of respect that goes with a uniform.   When he was two, he saluted and shook the hands of two Army privates as we all waited to board a flight in Baltimore.   He thanked them for their service and was excited to have met two heroes.   My cousin and her husband are both retired Navy Corpsmen.   When Davey met them he was just as excited to know that he has family who are heroes, like Captain America.   He sees heroes on t.v. and we read about them in books, but in those stories, the heroes don’t die.   They may get hurt, but they always come home.  How do you rationalize the difference between the make believe heroes and the real ones who are literally sacrificing their lives to protect ours?   It’s hard, but you find a way.

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It rained hard most of the afternoon and we worried if the rain would hold off so we would light our luminaries. God shined down upon us.

Friday afternoon, we lost one of our finest in Greenville, SC.   A police officer was looking to ask questions of a 17 year old self admitted gang member.   When he and his partner found the gang member, he ran from them.   Both officers took off on foot to pursue the young man.   Without speculation as to what happened or how it happened, Officer Allen Jacobs lost his life when he was shot multiple times by the juvenile.   He was gunned down without ever unholstering his gun.

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Setting up the luminaries.

We didn’t discuss Friday’s events with Davey.  He caught the occasional tidbit of news here and there, but for the most part stayed oblivious until today.   Today, our neighborhood decided to find a way to join together in solidarity, love, and support.  What we came to learn is that the parents of the officer who lost his life, live in our neighborhood.   While we don’t know them personally, this put more of a reality and close to home factor in it for us.   When you know the family of someone who is senselessly killed, it hurts more, you don’t just sympathize, but you feel as if you can almost have a sense of empathy with the family.  So, tonight at sunset, the neighborhood place luminaries along sidewalks, driveways and walkways.

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Setting up the luminaries.

We decided that with the impending luminaries of love, we should perhaps discuss what happened with Davey.   We told him about a police officer who died, how his mom and dad are our neighbors, and how he was a hero.   Davey’s questions mostly loomed around these…”Did a bad guy get him?”  Yes, a bad guy got him.  “Does my daddy need to go get the bad guy?”  No, the bad guy killed himself.  “You mean he took the gun and pointed it at himself?”  And Davey said this with a little bit of concern, his lower lip trembling slightly.   At this point, I wondered if perhaps I had gone too far, but decided to plow through.  Yes, Davey, he pointed the gun at himself.  “At least the bad guy is gone now,” was the response he had.

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Setting up the luminaries.

Later, at the start of sunset, we made a family affair of lining our walkway with paper bags, full of rocks, and votive candles.   Both boys helped, but whenever a police officer would drive by, they both stopped and stood in the front yard to wave.

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Setting up the luminaries.

It’s a horribly senseless tragedy.   My heart breaks every day.  I’ve found myself shedding tears daily as I’ve tried to put myself into the shoes of his widow, who is pregnant with their third child.   I feel inundated with waves of nausea as I “see” her lying down at night, after she’s tucked her two boys into bed, kissing their foreheads and reminding them of how much they were their daddy’s world.   I feel my heart breaking when she lies in the dark  caressing her daughter, still in the womb, as she tries to find ways to stay strong and tell her unborn daughter of how wonderful of a man her daddy was.   Tears stream down my face when I “see” her waking the next morning, from a fitful night of sleep, as she prays that she was just in the midst of a terrible dream and that the love of her life, her best friend, and soul mate, is really just coming home from work.   He did indeed come home, just not to his temporary one here.   Officer Jacobs went home to his Father, and while we all know he is in a better place and this was God’s will, we still hurt for those who lost him and for those of us who didn’t know him other than as a police officer and army veteran.

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Setting up the luminaries.

Heroes don’t always win and heroes don’t always live, but God’s will be done.

 

Rest in peace, Officer Jacobs.   Your brothers and sister will

Officer Jacobs
Officer Allen Jacobs EOW 3/18/16

take over from here.

Virtual Toy Drive

On By Doser3In Dreaming of Mommyhood - GeneralLeave a comment

The Greenville Health System’s Children’s Hospital in Greenville, SC is a wonderfully astounding facility. It is a Board Certified physicians care for more than 330,000 infants, children, and adolescents each year. New primary care offices have been opened up throughout the upstate to help the thousands of children who face some of the toughest of illnesses.

For years, our local NBC affiliate, WYFF, has sponsored the Children’s Hospital’s Virtual Toy Drive which allows for you to go to the website and buy a toy for a child. You can do this anonymously, as my husband and I choose to do, or you may attach your name along with a warm Christmas greeting and blessings. Most everyone within the Upstate of South Carolina is aware of this toy drive, but for those of you who are new to the area or new to blog, I wanted to let you know just a bit more about it and encourage you to help.

I’ve written blogs about the heartbreaking pains of watching a child suffer through an illness. As a parent, you’re riddled with emotions, but think about those children who are forced to overcome these adversities. So many children will spend their Christmases in hospitals around the country instead of nestled snug in their beds at home. For many of them, the hospital beds have become their homes and they hold their heads high and continue to trod through life. Regardless as to how these children cope or where they may do it, you and I have a responsibility to provide for those who are less fortunate.

Over the course of the holiday season, you’ll read blogs from me encouraging you to donate. Take a look at your children and be thankful for their health, their happiness, and their life. Step back and reevaluate those gifts you plan to purchase for your child(ren) and consider paring it down and purchasing a gift for a child in need. I’m posting a link to the Virtual Toy Drive in this blog, but also to my blog roll at the right of the screen.

Please, please consider purchasing a gift for a child less fortunate than your own. Help bring back the Christmas spirit not just for those children, but for society as well. And consider donating your time even if it’s only for one day.

http://www.ghschildrens.org/virtual-toy-drive.php

Take a Look Through My Lens

On By Doser3In Dreaming of Mommyhood - GeneralLeave a comment

Three years ago when Davey was about 9 months old, my husband and I bought a new camera. This isn’t just your easy, point and shoot camera. This is a Nikon 5100 complete with interchangeable lenses, filters, and manual operation. It’s not your high end camera, but it’s a little bit more advanced that the pocket sized digital cameras.

I’ve always had a fascination with photography. I’m mesmerized by it, by the things that the lens sees, things that perhaps the human eye doesn’t. Yeah, I know it’s all basically the same thing, but yet there are things captured on film that may never register with the naked eye. I love how each picture tells a story, the ones that are black and white to the ones of the squirrel sitting on the ground nibbling at an acorn. I’m intrigued by how a camera can pick up little nuances in a person’s face, moments that are so fleeting, that you may not have caught them just in passing. I adore the artistic side of photography and I find myself jealous of those who have this artistic ability that I can’t seem to master.

I’ve read books upon books, blogs upon blogs. I’ve taken classes, bought software and yet I’m still not as good as I was hoping to be. According to a class I took a couple of years ago, you really need to have a mathematic mind in order to take good pictures. I don’t have that, so I guess I’m screwed. I am; however, still eager to capture the growing moments in my boys’ lives. I still have this desire to try to take the beautiful pictures, the ones that could possibly be the winning picture in an amateur photo contest. I know I have this ability in me somewhere deep down, but unfortunately my boys don’t care to help me expand upon this.

Today was a beautiful fall day in the South. The temperature hovered around 55 degrees, with a bright sunlight that seemed to cast shadows on the ground and brighten up the beautifully changing leaves. Everyone was out today especially at our Falls Park in Greenville, SC. Before I go much further, let me take a moment to offer a quick plug for one of Greenville’s greatest attractions.

Falls Park is on the Reedy River. It is located between Main Street and a section once known as Camperdown Way. Years ago, the City tore down the bridge that was known as Campderdown Way to create a park that would highlight Greenville’s central attraction…The Reedy River. A pedestrian suspension bridge was built over the Reedy Falls, named the Liberty Bridge, which provides a wonderfully majestic view of the falls and the river. A park was created around the bridge, with fountains, open play areas, swings, and an outdoor amphitheater. A restaurant was also opened at the entrance of the park with sweeping views of the Reedy River. If you ever come to Greenville, please make sure to take a moment and visit this part of our city.

So, back to my autumn day at Falls Park. I thought it would be the perfect day to take some pictures of the boys. I had grand visions of well behaved children, holding hands as they walked across the bridge, stopping occasionally to look over and see the falls. What wonderful photo opportunities I would have! I’m sorry, but did I fall and smack my head at some point? What ever gave me the idea that I could perform a photo shoot with my boys? One of which acts like the Spawn of Satan and the other one who seems to be an aardvark, inhaling everything he comes across.

Yes, my boys…the bull in the china shop, otherwise known as Davey, and my impetuous taste tester who puts EVERYTHING in his mouth, otherwise known as Henry. Why would I have ever thought this was a good idea?

When Davey is outside he acts like a caged animal. Once the doors are open he runs like he’s been caged his entire life. Henry wants to keep up with him until he sees that bright leaf that has caught his attention and then he wants to chew on it, because apparently that’s his only sense…taste!

I spent an hour and a half yelling at Davey to slow down, stop running, look where you’re going, don’t throw rocks at the ducks, get away from that pigeon, don’t climb on the rocks, get away from that water, don’t jump in that puddle, until it finally culminated with him splashing around in the water fountains that are dyed purple for Alzheimer’s awareness. Yes! His hands are purple, almost the color of the toilets on the planes! He looks like he’s been shoving his hands into an airplane toilet!

Now, if I were a photographer and not a mom, I would have thought this cute and just snapped away with my camera, digitally marking all of this excitement, but I’m not a photographer, I’m a mom. I am a mom who just bought her boys matching outfits to wear for said photo shoot. A mom who is so exasperated with the oldest for ruining his brand new clothes that I almost felt like leaving him in the park!

He’s a strong-willed child, people say. He’s just a little boy, they remind me. He’s only three, they implore. Me? I just say he’s a little demon.

How did my photo shoot turn out, you ask? Horribly. I’m sad. I’m angry. I’m depressed, because I’ll see all these other pictures on Facebook of my friend’s children who look so picture perfect. And I’ll think to myself, why do I bother? Then tomorrow will be here and I’ll have another “brilliant” idea to document the boys’ lives, and we’ll start this whole insidious cycle again. I’m a glutton, what can I say?

Once I take the time to calm down and actually review the pictures I’ve taken, you’ll find them on my Facebook page, Dreaming of Mommyhood.

Adios, Summer 2014

On By Doser3In Dreaming of Mommyhood - GeneralLeave a comment

At 10:29 last night, Fall 2014 officially came into town. Since I’ve been a bit slack this summer with posting photos, adventures, and writing blogs, I thought what better time to give a quick rundown of our summer than with this “Goodbye to summer” and “Hello to Fall” blog!

June 21st, at 6:51 am, was this year’s Summer Solstice…otherwise known as the first official day of Summer! Fortunately, or unfortunately depending upon your view, summer in the Deep South seems to start in mid to late April. We’re hit with hot and humid days, sweltering heat and the occasional thunderstorms that only seem to make breathing worse instead of better. This year was no exception, but we won’t start with when it felt like summer, but instead the actual day. So, without further adieu, here is how we spent our first summer together as a foursome:

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Davey got his first official bicycle and began learning to ride. He was a quick learner at it and we ended up taking it every where with us this summer including Mimi & Pop’s who have a much longer driveway to ride it on.

Bike Riding Davey

We also took a field trip of sorts to our local free “waterpark” located in beautiful downtown Greenville, SC, outside the Lazy Goat. It’s nothing more than water fountains and spouts all along a fake train track, but Davey thoroughly enjoyed it.

Water Park Davey

July 4th we were in Rochester, NY visiting family for the week. We enjoyed everything from go kart racing to miniature golf, fireworks to parades, live music to horse races, and even had a cook out complete with our personal bouncy house. Another first was Henry’s plane ride and Davey now officially getting his own seat. We had a love/hate with Davey having his own seat. It was nice to NOT have to hold him, but ridiculous to pay for his seat.

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July 4th

Davey became a more advanced swimmer this year as we spent 3 days a week usually at Mimi and Pop’s house in their pool. Henry was introduced to his first pool experience and while he eventually came to enjoy it, it was a bit of a labor to get him in.

Swimmer Davey

Swimmer Henry

We threw in some zoo trips with friends and adventures at the Children’s Museum before finally getting our opportunity to enjoy the beach in mid August. We visited aquariums and battle ships. We built sand castles and rode the waves on boogie boards. Henry had his first experience with a crashing wave and quickly learned he didn’t like the taste of sand. Davey hunted for seashells and played miniature golf.

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We managed to find some time to take Davey to his first movie experience where he saw “Rio 2” and “Planes: Fire and Rescue.” We had amusement park rides and outlet shopping. I found time to participate in 2 triathlons with Davey finishing both of them with me.

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Finally, we closed out summer with Davey’s first season of soccer, some apple picking, backyard shenanigans, and 1/2 price ice cream cones.

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To Summer 2014, we’d like to say, “thank you for the memories, the adventures, and the heat. You were not a disappointment.”

And to Fall 2014, we’d like to say, “Bring on the pumpkins and leaves, the bonfires with s’mores, college football Saturdays, chili, and the smell of apple pies baking. Can’t wait to see what you have in store for us!”

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